Aging

All poems are copyrighted.
For permission to use, contact Drake via email.

THE JOYS OF AGING

You’ve just entered middle age
And you can feel your face falling.
Your heart is now a ticking bomb
And your arteries are stretched
As tight as fiddle strings.
When you first wake in the morning,
Even the bags under your eyes
Have bags,
And your face looks like you slept
On a wrinkled pillow case
All through the night.
Each day the mirror shows you
The contest on your head,
Between the hairs turning gray
And the ones falling out.
Despite your valiant attempt at exercise,
Your muscles are still moving to flab.
And no matter how many calories you cut,
A spare tire inflates around your waist.
It takes two days simply to recover
From pulling weeds or sitting on a floor for an hour.
It now takes a month to accomplish,
What it used to take a week to do.
Is it because you’re always in a hurry,
The panic of the downhill race begun?
Or is it the number of naps you’re taking,
Slowing the progress down?

HINTS TO HAPPY HEALTH

You’ve heard it all before
And may think it a bore.
Say the media to the doctor,
If you want to live longer,
More exercise and better diet
Is your best bet.
Right off the bat,
Cut the fat.
If it says “low” or “non”, buy that.
If its not made of veggies or fruit,
Give it the boot.
Watch out for too much carb.
In your body, it goes right to lard.
Sugar sure is sweet
But find another treat.
Put a halt
To excess salt.
Don’t eat a lot of meat
But replace it with soy and whole wheat.
Eat food full of fiber.
It’ll make your engine purr.
Cut out the daily booze.
At least several pounds, you will lose.
Reduce your body weight.
It’ll help lower your heart rate,
And perhaps avoid some unpleasant fate.
Come rain or shine,
Every day do exercise of some kind.
Curb your anger forever.
Don’t use it, not ever.
But replace it with goodwill
Or always be taking a blood pressure control pill.
Its easy to remember,
These simple rules for every him and her.
No fried, processed, or preserved food,
Just a good healthy attitude.
Always make it whole, fresh, or pure.
You’ll already feel younger
And a long life you will endure.

RETIREMENT

It seems like for this glorious day
You plan and plan and plan
Then suddenly the wait has gone away
And you are free!  Free you can
Spend the entire day in play
And become a brand new man.
Everything is now okay.
Your life is happy and gay
Because you already did pay
Your dues, so you can say
Hey I may
Just let the time while away.

 

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